The Worst of Sinners

"Here is a trustworthy statement that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners - of which I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who believe on him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen." - Timothy 1:15-17

...the worst of sinners...
To the world, I probably appear less of a sinner. I go to church, I read my Bible, I don't use fowl or crude language, I don't get drunk, I don't sleep around, I talk about my faith...but even then I am a sinner, the worst of sinners, in which Christ came into the world to save. Although my flaws may not be seen my many in the world, my sin, my missing the marks of perfection are very real and they run deep. In my heart I harbor bitterness, anger, jealousy, idolatry, lust, inability to be self-controlled, gossip, unforgiveness, ungenuineness (if that is even a word)...and the list could go on and on. Although it may not always be seen, which is often not the case, even I, one who claims to know and daily experience the grace of God and follow Jesus, am a sinner in need of saving.

...that....Christ Jesus might be able to display his unlimited patience as an example for those who believe on him and have eternal life...
Although my sin may not be as clear to the naked eye, I know the depths of my hearts wretchedness. And my own sinful, fallen, and human eyes are able to see the depths of my sin, how much more is the holy, perfect and spotless One able to see. I began to think about how others (ie: my classmates, unbelieving friends from college, etc.) would think if I posted these verses on my Facebook, or if I shared it with them. Now of course, they all know I am not perfect, many of which have seen me in my broken states of sin, but I wondered what they would think. Then I began to think about, how even many times they did see me as a strong Christian or goody tooshoes, but when in reality, I was just covering up and masking my true identity of a sinner and unconfessed sin in my life that was really reigning me. What came to my mind were the many stories you hear about on the news when someone dresses up in uniform and begins to pretend the roll of a police officer, army soldier, etc. They believe that by putting on this attire and deceiveing unsuspecting people, that they may get away with this false identity and false power...all while performing an illegal act. How often do I put on the suit of "good Christian," all while my heart is holding unconfessed or unsurrendered sin. I masquerade around, hoping others will believe my outward appearance, so to distract from the reality of what is truly inside of me. It is then, where I not only see the wretcheness of mysinful nature in the sin I do, but also in the sin I create while trying to not be sinful. Even when I'm attempting to be good and right and pleasing to God, I don't even come close to good and holy. But what I have and continue to learn and see each day is that He truly is patient...unlimitly patient!!

...to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever....
Because of His holiness, His unlimited patience, His mercy, I, the worst of sinners, can be free from the guilt and shame of sin. I am free from the eternal punishment of my imperfections. And through all this, through Him displaying his unlimited patience and his great mercy in me, a wretched sinner, undeserving of even a kind action from a great and powerful God, He displays his holiness, love, mercy, unlimited patience, power, character...and saves me...the worst of sinners. All for this last sentence: to the King...the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.